Deceptive

How could such an incredibility smart, well educated, handsome man be so torchered in his life that he no longer found a reason for living. This was the journey we were about to embark on. He just simply could not stop drinking. In the beginning I didn't believe that. I really thought it was mind over matter. It wasn't. It was a very misunderstood disease. I spent all my free time trying to find out what was going on. Why was his life reeling out of control. A divorce could not have been the entire reason, especially since he was not happy being married.

He decided that maybe a change of scenery would help him to feel better. We started out on a "Road Trip" to see his best friend up in Northern California. They had grown up together from the high school days. They both went to the same boarding school and were like brothers. He thought seeing his friend would do him good. So off we went to Northern California.

His friend was actually teaching at their old school and also living there. It was weird for me to go to this old mansion which was now his friends apartment also. He had an apartment type situation on the top floor of this old former mansion which was and had been a part of this Prep School that they went to.

The first night there Bob got really drunk "surprise, surprise" and opened the windows on the top floor and crawled out on the ledge and started walking around out there. He was three stories up high and I was freaking out. I begged him to come back inside. It was the first time I realized he indeed was a man with a death wish. An adrenaline junkie or whatever. I would come to accept in time that he had no fear of dying and at times actually seemed to get pleasure from putting himself in harms way.
The only problem was he couldn't find the courage to do it, so he flirted with danger with an attitude of "Whatever". There was no fear ever.